BIRMINGHAM:THE UNIVERSITY OF LIFE-A POEM ABOUT MY FRESHMAN YEAR AT BIRMINGHAM UNIVERSITY IN 1976

BIRMINGHAM: THE UNIVERSITY OF LIFE

 

Back in Nineteen Seventy Six

 

When the Hot Sun baked the broiling Bricks

 

And Denis Howell MP for Small Heath

denis-howell-mp

 

Was ‘Minister for Drought’ in the searing heat

 

He urged us all to bathe together

 

And not run round ‘Hell for Leather’

 

I went from Birmingham Grammar School Boy

george-dixon-school-tower

 

To the University in Edgbaston with Unbridled Joy

chancellors-court

 

This Bright but Callow Bearwood Lad

bear-hotel

 

Became a Birmingham Undergrad

 

Studying B.Com in the Muirhead Tower

muirhead-tower

 

Where The Paternoster Lifts ran Hour after Hour

 

Perpetual Motion taking ‘Tortured Souls’

 

To jump off this Brutalist Muirhead Coil

 

When Exams in Accounts became too much to Toil

 

Doctor Peter Cain my ancient Tutor

 

 

Urged this Fresh man to use the first Punch-Card Computer

 

This Student donned a Great Coat and Scarf

 

And would do anything for a ‘Belly Laugh’

 

Like Read the Communist Manifesto

communist-manifesto

 

At Peter Cain’s educated behest….Oh!

 

Marx and Engels to the Fore

 

As all us Students fought ‘The Class War’!

 

David Lodge’s ‘Nice Work’ if you can gerrit…..?

david-lodge

 

Made University Life seem so decrepit

 

To study Accounts was my Forte

 

Or so I often thought…..Eh….?

 

But when The Doubts began to creep in

 

And my ‘Number Blindness’ started to seep in

 

To my youthful callow consciousness

 

With such dire unfortunate consequences

 

My exam time worry started to show

 

And I was struck such a Mortal Blow

 

When I failed my Exams in Stats and Maths

 

But Tutor Cain set me on a Different Path

 

To study Law and forget the Math

 

Peter told me I still had a Bright Future

 

No longer for me the Statistical Torture!

 

For this Rugby-Playing Muddied Oaf

 

On the Bournbrook pitches…. I used my Loaf

dixonians-full-back

 

And played for the University First Fifteen

 

As an Eighteen Year Old Flyaway Flanker

 

I made my debut for my Alma Mater

 

Where my Rugby defined me as a Young Man

 

Without any sort of discernible plan

 

The First Fifteen I played in October ‘76

 

Before I even made my debut for The Old Dix!!!!!first-old-dixonians-team-2

 

Julia Honeychurch was my squeeze

 

Back in Strathcona we ‘Shot the Breeze’!

 

Mick’s Café’s Race and Carnival

 

Was what defined me as a pal

 

A ‘Belly-Buster Breakfast’ and a pint of Guinness

 

The aim not to throw up at the Breathless Finish

 

A Two Mile Run from the Student’s Union

university-of-bham-students-union

 

Down to Heeley Road and a date with Oblivion

 

Where Bacon and Egg were downed with Glee

 

Before running back to ‘The Mermaid in The See’

 

That’s when it all went ‘Pete Tong’ for me

 

As I threw up and my Salad Days

 

Became Carrots and Peas

 

And I was in an Alcoholic Daze

 

While on my knees

 

All good fun to raise ‘Cash for Carnival’

high-hall

 

I was no longer a ‘Freshman Virgin’ in High Hall….!!!!!

 

 

 

Keith Bracey

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2 thoughts on “BIRMINGHAM:THE UNIVERSITY OF LIFE-A POEM ABOUT MY FRESHMAN YEAR AT BIRMINGHAM UNIVERSITY IN 1976

  1. Pingback: BIRMINGHAM:THE UNIVERSITY OF LIFE-A POEM ABOUT MY FRESHMAN YEAR AT BIRMINGHAM UNIVERSITY IN 1976 | keithbracey

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